tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-29470789234427678152024-03-05T01:15:16.332-08:00Fourteen From HimRobert and Katherinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03658174516021661130noreply@blogger.comBlogger17125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2947078923442767815.post-54300300934209272272012-10-16T15:08:00.003-07:002012-10-17T10:27:25.134-07:00WE ARE MOVING!<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: large;">Well, not literally...we like our home.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">However, we have moved our blog.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">You can find us here:</span></div>
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<a href="http://ontheirjourney.blogspot.com/"><span style="font-size: large;">http://ontheirjourney.blogspot.com</span></a></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">Hope to see you there!</span></div>
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Robert and Katherinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03658174516021661130noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2947078923442767815.post-10371037610340213832012-10-15T15:55:00.000-07:002012-10-15T16:25:48.906-07:00Eighteen from Him!<br />
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<i><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">I will bring thy seed from the east, and gather thee from the west; I will say to the north, Give up; and to the south, Keep not back: bring my sons from far, and my daughters from the ends of the earth; Even every one that is called by my name: for I have created him for my glory, I have formed him; yea, I have made him.</span></i></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;">Isaiah 43:5-7</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">This message, found in the center of the Bible, has been a true blessing to us through the years. It was an Old Testament promise to Israel that they would once again live in the Promised Land. Today that same promise holds for the Christians whom the Lord will call his own. Yet, it is also a poignant set of verses which speaks strongly to adoptive parents. And it is the beginning of several of our children's story...</span><span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">for we are parents to children from the east, west, north, and south, who are now called by Christ's name and bring him glory!</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Come to find out, God was not done bringing children </span><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">into </span><span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">our hearts and home.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">For years we had been praying for a word from the Lord as to whether He wanted us to add more children to our family through adoption. We are still quite young (well...at least that holds true for my wife!) and through experience have learned much about parenting children, regardless of how or where they were come from.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Not to mention, we know Adoption Truth #14:</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">Never say never to adoption again. As time goes on and you learn to parent the adopted child, there are many more hurting children who need and want parents.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">The impression from the Lord to our prayer was yes, but wait. So year after year, we continued to wait and trust that the Lord would make it clear in his timing. </span></div>
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<i><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">For the vision is yet for an appointed time, but at the end it</span></i></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><i>shall </i><i>speak, </i><i>and not lie: </i><i>though it tarry, wait for it; </i><i>because</i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><i>it will </i><i>surely come, </i><i>it will not tarry.</i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;">Habakkuk 2:3</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Katherine had a desire in her heart to <i>know</i> if we were to adopt again. It was a growing burden for her. O</span><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">n November 16, 2010, she and I went out to dinner. </span><span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">While discussing our life, children, and future over a 'Bloomin Onion', she hit me with the question. She asked if I would </span><span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">be OK with adopting more children. </span><span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">I immediately responded, </span><br />
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<em><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">“<strong>If God drops children in our l</strong></span></em><em><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><strong>ap,</strong> <strong>I am not opposed to it</strong>.”</span></em><br />
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<span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">Much to her surprise and mine, o</span><span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">n Wednesday, March 9, 2011 the Lord 'dropped four children in our lap'. On September 14, 2012, the Philippines gave us permission to adopt them. Now we wait for more paperwork to be done with the understanding that in 2-3 months from now we will be able to travel to bring them home. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">You can follow their story through our 'Journey to Cebu' blog posts at:</span><br />
<a href="http://ontheirjourney.blogspot.com/">http://ontheirjourney.blogspot.com/</a><br />
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<span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span>Robert and Katherinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03658174516021661130noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2947078923442767815.post-3624779890659665622012-10-06T11:23:00.001-07:002012-10-06T11:23:34.476-07:00Books and More Books<br />
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<i>Yea, if thou criest after knowledge, and liftest up thy voice for understanding; If thou seekest her as silver, and searchest for her as for hid treasures; Then shalt thou understand the fear of the Lord, and find the knowledge of God. For the Lord giveth wisdom: out of his mouth cometh knowledge and understanding.</i></div>
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Proverbs 2:3-6</div>
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In the early years, we were drowning under issues which ensued after we adopted. We sought counsel from many venues, primarily the Bible and through prayer. Over time the Lord began to lead us to what the adoptive world would call 'unconventional books'. However, through the information in these books our family began to heal and see more clearly though 'through a glass, darkly'.<br />
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Attachment issues and/or RAD are not new issues (consider: Cain, Ishmael, Esau, Absalom and Judas), but with the influx of adopted children, we are seeing a pronounced rise of publicity regarding these behaviors. The truth also remains, many families beyond number deal with these very same issues everyday with birth-children who were never abused, neglected, or abandoned. Though this brought us extreme comfort (it is not just an adoption issue), it did have us begin looking at our 'problems' from a new angle.<br />
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Thus this book list was formed as the Lord lead us to more and more information 'shedding light' on our cry for help in dealing with our children. May you be blessed by this list as well. Over time we will be 'highlighting' different books in a review, but for now here they are in list form.<br />
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Happy Reading!<br />
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The Family
Nobody Wanted <o:p></o:p></div>
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By Helen Doss<o:p></o:p></div>
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<a href="http://www.amazon.com/Family-Nobody-Wanted-Helen-Doss/dp/1555535038/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1346800765&sr=8-1&keywords=the+family+nobody+wanted">http://www.amazon.com/Family-Nobody-Wanted-Helen-Doss/dp/1555535038/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1346800765&sr=8-1&keywords=the+family+nobody+wanted</a><o:p></o:p></div>
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Twelve-Part
Harmony: A Heartwarming Story of Adoption<o:p></o:p></div>
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By Pat and Jill Williams <o:p></o:p></div>
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<a href="http://www.amazon.com/Twelve-Part-Harmony-Pat-Williams/dp/080071640X/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1346800958&sr=1-1&keywords=twelve-part+harmony">http://www.amazon.com/Twelve-Part-Harmony-Pat-Williams/dp/080071640X/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1346800958&sr=1-1&keywords=twelve-part+harmony</a><o:p></o:p></div>
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You’ve Got
to Be Kidding!: Real-life Parenting from a Mom and Dad of Nineteen<o:p></o:p></div>
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By Pat and Ruth Williams (sequel
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<a href="http://www.amazon.com/Youve-Got-Kidding-Real-life-parenting/dp/1578567033/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1346801017&sr=1-1&keywords=you%27ve+got+to+be+kidding+williams">http://www.amazon.com/Youve-Got-Kidding-Real-life-parenting/dp/1578567033/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1346801017&sr=1-1&keywords=you%27ve+got+to+be+kidding+williams</a><o:p></o:p></div>
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Adoption as
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By Michelle Gardner <o:p></o:p></div>
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<a href="http://www.amazon.com/Adoption-As-Ministry-Blessing/dp/1579215815/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1346801049&sr=1-1&keywords=Adoption+as+a+Ministry%2C+Adoption+as+a+Blessing">http://www.amazon.com/Adoption-As-Ministry-Blessing/dp/1579215815/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1346801049&sr=1-1&keywords=Adoption+as+a+Ministry%2C+Adoption+as+a+Blessing</a><o:p></o:p></div>
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After the
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By Michelle Gardner <o:p></o:p></div>
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<a href="http://www.amazon.com/After-Dream-Comes-Michelle-Gardner/dp/1414102674/ref=sr_1_fkmr1_2?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1346801250&sr=1-2-fkmr1&keywords=After+the+Dream+Comes+True%3A+Post-Adoption+Support+for+Christian+Families">http://www.amazon.com/After-Dream-Comes-Michelle-Gardner/dp/1414102674/ref=sr_1_fkmr1_2?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1346801250&sr=1-2-fkmr1&keywords=After+the+Dream+Comes+True%3A+Post-Adoption+Support+for+Christian+Families</a><o:p></o:p></div>
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Shepherding
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By Tedd Tripp<o:p></o:p></div>
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<a href="http://www.amazon.com/Shepherding-Childs-Heart-Tedd-Tripp/dp/0966378601/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1346801328&sr=1-1&keywords=Shepherding+a+Child%C2%92s+Heart">http://www.amazon.com/Shepherding-Childs-Heart-Tedd-Tripp/dp/0966378601/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1346801328&sr=1-1&keywords=Shepherding+a+Child%C2%92s+Heart</a><o:p></o:p></div>
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Age of
Opportunity: A Biblical Guide to Parenting Teens<o:p></o:p></div>
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By Paul David Tripp<o:p></o:p></div>
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<a href="http://www.amazon.com/Opportunity-Biblical-guide-parenting-teens/dp/B0035Y5YJ0/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1346801383&sr=1-1&keywords=Age+of+Opportunity%3A+A+Biblical+Guide+to+Parenting+Teens">http://www.amazon.com/Opportunity-Biblical-guide-parenting-teens/dp/B0035Y5YJ0/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1346801383&sr=1-1&keywords=Age+of+Opportunity%3A+A+Biblical+Guide+to+Parenting+Teens</a><o:p></o:p></div>
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Instructing
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By Tedd & Margy Tripp<o:p></o:p></div>
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<a href="http://www.amazon.com/Instructing-Childs-Heart-Tedd-Tripp/dp/0981540007/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1346801409&sr=1-1&keywords=Instructing+a+Child%C2%92s+Heart">http://www.amazon.com/Instructing-Childs-Heart-Tedd-Tripp/dp/0981540007/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1346801409&sr=1-1&keywords=Instructing+a+Child%C2%92s+Heart</a><o:p></o:p></div>
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What the
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By Richard Fugate<o:p></o:p></div>
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<a href="http://www.amazon.com/What-Bible-About-Child-Training/dp/1889700134/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1346801446&sr=1-1&keywords=What+the+Bible+says+about+Child+Training">http://www.amazon.com/What-Bible-About-Child-Training/dp/1889700134/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1346801446&sr=1-1&keywords=What+the+Bible+says+about+Child+Training</a><o:p></o:p></div>
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Hints on
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By H. Clay Trumbull<o:p></o:p></div>
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<a href="http://www.amazon.com/Hints-Child-Training-Classic-Reprint-Trumbull/dp/B008IVYTY6/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1346801483&sr=1-1&keywords=Hints+on+Child+Training">http://www.amazon.com/Hints-Child-Training-Classic-Reprint-Trumbull/dp/B008IVYTY6/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1346801483&sr=1-1&keywords=Hints+on+Child+Training</a><o:p></o:p></div>
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Raising
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By L. Elizabeth Krueger<o:p></o:p></div>
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<a href="http://www.amazon.com/Raising-Godly-Tomatoes-Elizabeth-Krueger/dp/1605303305/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1346801509&sr=1-1&keywords=Raising+Godly+Tomatoes">http://www.amazon.com/Raising-Godly-Tomatoes-Elizabeth-Krueger/dp/1605303305/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1346801509&sr=1-1&keywords=Raising+Godly+Tomatoes</a><o:p></o:p></div>
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The Heart of
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By Lou Priolo<o:p></o:p></div>
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<a href="http://www.amazon.com/Heart-Anger-Practical-Prevention-Children/dp/1879737280/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1346801540&sr=1-1&keywords=The+Heart+of+Anger">http://www.amazon.com/Heart-Anger-Practical-Prevention-Children/dp/1879737280/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1346801540&sr=1-1&keywords=The+Heart+of+Anger</a>
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Fool-Proofing
Your Life<o:p></o:p></div>
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By Jan Silvious<o:p></o:p></div>
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<a href="http://www.amazon.com/Foolproofing-Your-Life-Effectively-Impossible/dp/0307458482/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1346801606&sr=1-1&keywords=Fool-Proofing+Your+Life">http://www.amazon.com/Foolproofing-Your-Life-Effectively-Impossible/dp/0307458482/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1346801606&sr=1-1&keywords=Fool-Proofing+Your+Life</a>
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Family
Practice: God’s Prescription for a Healthy Home<o:p></o:p></div>
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By R.C. Sproul Jr., Elizabeth
Elliot, and others<o:p></o:p></div>
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<a href="http://www.amazon.com/Family-Practice-Gods-Prescription-Healthy/dp/0875524982/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1346801661&sr=1-1&keywords=Family+Practice%3A+God%C2%92s+Prescription+for+a+Healthy+Home">http://www.amazon.com/Family-Practice-Gods-Prescription-Healthy/dp/0875524982/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1346801661&sr=1-1&keywords=Family+Practice%3A+God%C2%92s+Prescription+for+a+Healthy+Home</a>
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Bringing the
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The Duties
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The Duties
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The
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Love and
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Thoughts on
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When You
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<o:p> </o:p>The
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<a href="http://www.amazon.com/Peacemaker-Biblical-Resolving-Personal-Conflict/dp/0801064856/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1347678360&sr=1-1&keywords=peacemaker">http://www.amazon.com/Peacemaker-Biblical-Resolving-Personal-Conflict/dp/0801064856/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1347678360&sr=1-1&keywords=peacemaker</a>
<o:p></o:p></div>
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War on Words<o:p></o:p></div>
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By Paul Tripp<o:p></o:p></div>
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<a href="http://www.amazon.com/War-Words-Communication-Struggles-Resources/dp/0875526047/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1347054849&sr=1-1&keywords=war+on+words">http://www.amazon.com/War-Words-Communication-Struggles-Resources/dp/0875526047/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1347054849&sr=1-1&keywords=war+on+words</a> <o:p></o:p></div>
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The Biblical
View of Self-Esteem, Self-love, and Self-Image<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
By Jay E. Adams<o:p></o:p></div>
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<a href="http://www.amazon.com/Biblical-View-Self-Esteem-Self-Love-Self-Image/dp/0890815534/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1347054927&sr=1-1&keywords=The+Biblical+View+of+Self-Esteem%2C+Self-Love%2C+and+Self-Image">http://www.amazon.com/Biblical-View-Self-Esteem-Self-Love-Self-Image/dp/0890815534/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1347054927&sr=1-1&keywords=The+Biblical+View+of+Self-Esteem%2C+Self-Love%2C+and+Self-Image</a>
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How To Help
People Change: Four-Step Biblical Process<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
By Jay E. Adams<o:p></o:p></div>
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<a href="http://www.amazon.com/How-Help-People-Change-Adams/dp/031051181X/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1347054246&sr=8-1&keywords=How+To+Help+People+Change%3A+Four-Step+Biblical+Process">http://www.amazon.com/How-Help-People-Change-Adams/dp/031051181X/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1347054246&sr=8-1&keywords=How+To+Help+People+Change%3A+Four-Step+Biblical+Process</a>
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<br /></div>
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The
Whole-Brain Child: 12 Revolutionary Strategies to Nurture Your Child’s
Developing Mind<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
By Daniel Siegel<o:p></o:p></div>
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<a href="http://www.amazon.com/Whole-Brain-Child-Revolutionary-Strategies-Developing/dp/0553386697/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1347054283&sr=1-1&keywords=The+Whole-Brain+Child%3A+12+Revolutionary+Strategies+to+Nurture+Your+Child%C2%92s+Developing+Mind">http://www.amazon.com/Whole-Brain-Child-Revolutionary-Strategies-Developing/dp/0553386697/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1347054283&sr=1-1&keywords=The+Whole-Brain+Child%3A+12+Revolutionary+Strategies+to+Nurture+Your+Child%C2%92s+Developing+Mind</a>
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Inside the
Brain: Revolutionary Discoveries of How the Mind Works<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
By Ronald Kotulak <o:p></o:p></div>
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<a href="http://www.amazon.com/Inside-Brain-Revolutionary-Discoveries-Works/dp/0836232895/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1347054322&sr=1-1&keywords=Inside+the+Brain%3A+Revolutionary+Discoveries+of+How+the+Mind+Works">http://www.amazon.com/Inside-Brain-Revolutionary-Discoveries-Works/dp/0836232895/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1347054322&sr=1-1&keywords=Inside+the+Brain%3A+Revolutionary+Discoveries+of+How+the+Mind+Works</a>
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The Brain
That Changes Itself<o:p></o:p></div>
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By Norman Doidge<o:p></o:p></div>
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<a href="http://www.amazon.com/The-Brain-That-Changes-Itself/dp/0143113100/ref=sr_1_fkmr0_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1347054355&sr=1-1-fkmr0&keywords=IThe+Brain+That+Changes+Itself">http://www.amazon.com/The-Brain-That-Changes-Itself/dp/0143113100/ref=sr_1_fkmr0_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1347054355&sr=1-1-fkmr0&keywords=IThe+Brain+That+Changes+Itself</a>
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<o:p> </o:p> </div>
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The Wounded
Heart: Hope for Adult Victims of Childhood S’xual Abuse<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
By Dr. Dan B. Allender<o:p></o:p></div>
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<a href="http://www.amazon.com/The-Wounded-Heart-Victims-Childhood/dp/1600063071/ref=sr_1_fkmr0_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1347054398&sr=1-1-fkmr0&keywords=The+Wounded+Heart%3A+Hope+for+Adult+Victims+of+Childhood+S%C2%92xual+Abuse">http://www.amazon.com/The-Wounded-Heart-Victims-Childhood/dp/1600063071/ref=sr_1_fkmr0_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1347054398&sr=1-1-fkmr0&keywords=The+Wounded+Heart%3A+Hope+for+Adult+Victims+of+Childhood+S%C2%92xual+Abuse</a>
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Ghosts from
the Nursey: Tracing the Roots of Violence<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
By Robin Karr-Morse and Meredith
S. Wiley <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<a href="http://www.amazon.com/Ghosts-Nursery-Tracing-Roots-Violence/dp/0871137348/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1347054475&sr=1-1&keywords=Ghosts+from+the+Nursey%3A+Tracing+the+Roots+of+Violence">http://www.amazon.com/Ghosts-Nursery-Tracing-Roots-Violence/dp/0871137348/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1347054475&sr=1-1&keywords=Ghosts+from+the+Nursey%3A+Tracing+the+Roots+of+Violence</a>
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On Combat<o:p></o:p></div>
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By Lt. Col. Dave Grossman with
Loren Christensen<o:p></o:p></div>
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<a href="http://www.amazon.com/The-Boy-Raised-Psychiatrists-Notebook-What/dp/0465056539/ref=pd_sim_b_13">http://www.amazon.com/The-Boy-Raised-Psychiatrists-Notebook-What/dp/0465056539/ref=pd_sim_b_13</a>
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The Boy Who
was Raised as a Dog<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
By Dr. Bruce Perry and Maia
Szalavitz<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<a href="http://www.amazon.com/The-Boy-Raised-Psychiatrists-Notebook-What/dp/0465056539/ref=pd_sim_b_13">http://www.amazon.com/The-Boy-Raised-Psychiatrists-Notebook-What/dp/0465056539/ref=pd_sim_b_13</a>
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<span style="font-size: 16.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><b>Adoption Books</b><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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This Means War: Equipping Families for Adoption or Foster Care</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
By Cheryl Ellicott</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<a href="http://www.amazon.com/This-Means-War-Equipping-Fostercare/dp/098435994X/ref=sr_1_4?ie=UTF8&qid=1349546219&sr=8-4&keywords=Christian+adoption+books">http://www.amazon.com/This-Means-War-Equipping-Fostercare/dp/098435994X/ref=sr_1_4?ie=UTF8&qid=1349546219&sr=8-4&keywords=Christian+adoption+books</a></div>
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<br /></div>
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Adopting for
Good: A Guide for People Considering Adoption <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
By Jorie Kincaid<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<a href="http://www.amazon.com/Adopting-Good-People-Considering-Adoption/dp/0756765315/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1346805204&sr=1-1&keywords=Adopting+for+Good%3A+A+Guide+for+People+Considering+Adoption">http://www.amazon.com/Adopting-Good-People-Considering-Adoption/dp/0756765315/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1346805204&sr=1-1&keywords=Adopting+for+Good%3A+A+Guide+for+People+Considering+Adoption</a>
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<br /></div>
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Adopted for
Life: The Priority of Adoption for Christian Families and Churches</div>
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<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
By Russell D. Moore<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<a href="http://www.amazon.com/Adopted-Life-Priority-Adoption-Christian/dp/1581349114/ref=sr_1_fkmr1_2?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1346801049&sr=1-2-fkmr1&keywords=Adoption+as+a+Ministry%2C+Adoption+as+a+Blessing">http://www.amazon.com/Adopted-Life-Priority-Adoption-Christian/dp/1581349114/ref=sr_1_fkmr1_2?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1346801049&sr=1-2-fkmr1&keywords=Adoption+as+a+Ministry%2C+Adoption+as+a+Blessing</a>
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<o:p> </o:p> </div>
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Adoption
Nation: How the Adoption Revolution is Transforming Our Families—and America<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
By Adam Pertman<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<a href="http://www.amazon.com/Adoption-Nation-Revolution-Transforming-Families/dp/1558327169/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1347056077&sr=1-1&keywords=Adoption+Nation%3A+How+the+Adoption+Revolution+is+Transforming+Our+Families+--+and+America">http://www.amazon.com/Adoption-Nation-Revolution-Transforming-Families/dp/1558327169/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1347056077&sr=1-1&keywords=Adoption+Nation%3A+How+the+Adoption+Revolution+is+Transforming+Our+Families+--+and+America</a>
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<o:p><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></o:p></div>
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<o:p><b><span style="font-size: large;">Devotionals</span></b></o:p></div>
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<o:p><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></o:p></div>
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<o:p>My Utmost For His Highest</o:p></div>
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By Oswald Chambers</div>
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<a href="http://www.amazon.com/My-Utmost-His-Highest-CHRISTIAN/dp/1577489144/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1349546562&sr=1-1&keywords=my+utmost+for+his+highest">http://www.amazon.com/My-Utmost-His-Highest-CHRISTIAN/dp/1577489144/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1349546562&sr=1-1&keywords=my+utmost+for+his+highest</a></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
Morning and Evening</div>
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By C.H. Spurgeon</div>
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<a href="http://www.amazon.com/Morning-Evening-Version-Devotional-Encouragement/dp/1598565699/ref=sr_1_7?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1349546666&sr=1-7&keywords=morning+and+evening+by+charles+spurgeon">http://www.amazon.com/Morning-Evening-Version-Devotional-Encouragement/dp/1598565699/ref=sr_1_7?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1349546666&sr=1-7&keywords=morning+and+evening+by+charles+spurgeon</a></div>
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Daily Strength for Daily Needs</div>
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By Mary W. Tileston</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<a href="http://www.amazon.com/Daily-Strengths-Needs-Wilder-Tileston/dp/147007480X/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1349546810&sr=1-1&keywords=daily+strength+for+daily+needs+by+mary+tileston">http://www.amazon.com/Daily-Strengths-Needs-Wilder-Tileston/dp/147007480X/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1349546810&sr=1-1&keywords=daily+strength+for+daily+needs+by+mary+tileston</a></div>
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<o:p><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></o:p></div>
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2012, Robert
and Katherine Sanford, Adoption Heart Ministries<o:p></o:p></div>
Robert and Katherinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03658174516021661130noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2947078923442767815.post-44999279839329272392012-10-03T06:18:00.000-07:002012-10-03T07:10:22.310-07:00Which 'Institution' Is Best?<span style="font-size: x-small;"><i>[While attending the Lifesong for Orphans Benefit in 2008, we were asked by an orphan advocate from the east-coast to share our thoughts regarding group home verses foster care for children entering 'the system'. This is the response. It is still relevant today.]</i></span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-small;"><i><br /></i></span>
<span style="font-size: x-small;"><i><br /></i></span>
<span style="font-size: x-small;"><i><br /></i></span>
<span style="font-size: x-small;"><i><br /></i></span>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<!--[if supportFields]><span
style='mso-element:field-begin'></span><span
style='mso-spacerun:yes'> </span>SEQ CHAPTER \h \r 1<![endif]--><!--[if supportFields]><span
style='mso-element:field-end'></span><![endif]--><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Dear Sir,</span> </div>
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<o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">You
posed the question...which is more beneficial for
children in America taken from their homes by Social Services, to be placed in
a group home or a foster care home prior to returning to birth-family or
adoption or their 18th birthday? </span><o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">This
is a very interesting question of which we have given quite a bit of thought to
over the last seven years. What precipitated our internal query into the subject
is the interesting fact that we adopted four girls through our local foster
care system, four children through a Russian orphanage and three children who
had been in the Philippine's orphanage and foster care/group home system as
well as having three children by birth. By God's sovereign design all eleven of
our adopted children (regardless of country origin) had at least one, if not
more, of their 'new siblings' sharing similar stories and ages of when they
first came into 'State care' as well as similar ages of when we adopted them.
How these children adjusted, embraced or rejected our family, having the
'control factor' of three birth-children as well as having many friends who
have adopted, gave rise to the question...Which 'Public Institution'
(orphanage, foster care, or group home) is best to help a child adjust to being
placed in a permanent family by adoption or to enter the world on the 18th birthday?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">The
curious thing is, our foreign-born children (ranging in ages from 8-12
years old) coming from an orphanage and group home setting did better adjusting
to the ebb and flow of joining an adoptive family (at least at first). The 11
yr. old who came from a foster home in the USA had a much harder time of
adjusting. There are many factors that could and do attribute to this
difference but the one that is most pertinent to this conversation is the
reality that the girls loyalty was to their birth-family though parental rights
had been terminated and they could not have contact until their 18<sup>th</sup>
birthday. They had not come to terms with this in the truest sense or in the
depths of their heart. So when they were approached regarding adoption they
were all for it as the next step in
‘housing’; not because they wanted to have fellowship, bond with, or learn from
these new parents. It is with these experiences in mind that we share the
following thoughts.</span><o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">There
are true advantages to placing older children/young adults (10 yrs old to 18)
in a group home or orphanage The often traumatic but necessary event of 'taking
children from their birth-family' creates emotions and reactions that could be
better processed if the child were with other children of 'like situation'. The
process of placing this older child/young adult in a family setting to be
repeatedly moved or jostled from visits with birth-family to assimilating into
foster-family puts a toll on all involved. Often in these moves between foster
families there are changes in school of which they are the 'only ones' in
foster care. So not only do they have to deal with the emotions of leaving
birth-family (even if it is bad, it is all they knew!) they have the emotions of
'joining' another family culture (hopefully of a higher moral character then
the one they came from) and peer culture adding new stress on top of the stress
of uncertainty. The group home setting adds stability to an unstable situation.
The child is mainly forced to adjust to a few rules to make life pleasant for
all occupants. In a foster home situation the child not only must obey the
family rules but typically is expected to join in the family activities and adapt
to their 'way of doing things'. Now for some children this is a welcome change
and a dream come true. But for many teenagers this is just fodder for more
rebellion and wayward behavior meaning removal to a new foster home. Also, if
the State decides to try birth-parent and child reunion and it does not work,
the child never returns to the former foster care home; but maybe they could
return to the same group home (unfamiliar with group home policy). This
would cut down on adjustments while in 'the system'.</span><o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">Younger
children are no less subject to the emotions and trauma of being displaced from
their birth-families. However, due to the fact that they are not as peer driven
and still need nurturing, they are better suited to be placed in foster care
families where their individual needs can be met and directed towards healthy
responses. This not only applies to their physical needs but as well as their
emotional, mental, and spiritual needs. Babies (0-3 yo) are in particular need
of individualized care which only foster care can provide. Studies have shown
the benefits of rocking, holding especially during bottle feeding, eye contact,
engaged conversation, etc. goes miles towards healthy development (</span><span class="WPEmphasis" style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;"><i>Inside The Brain </i>by </span><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">Ronald Kotulak</span><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">). This cannot be
properly or adequately done in a group home or orphanage setting. </span></div>
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<o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span class="WPEmphasis"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><i>A fool hath no delight in understanding, but that his heart
may discover itself. </i></span></span><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="font-size: xx-small;">Proverbs 18:2</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">
Even these two assessments, based on having adopted several children of
varying ages and backgrounds, is flawed from the beginning. The reality is, we
live in a fallen world where sin is the driving force of man's nature; if he has
not been 'born again' of the Holy Spirit. So the act of putting children in a
group home, orphanage, or foster home is compounded by the adults and the
children they are trying to help. It is difficult enough to deal with a child
who lies, steals, and cheats when you have adopted them. It is a whole other
game when they are 'Wards of the State' and they are seen as victims of abuse
instead of potential abusers themselves. They should be seen as 'little sinners' capable of the most hideous crimes against God and man if left to their own
vices; thereby possible abusers of the very people who are trying to help them.
The other danger in this mix is, if two or more 'sinful' children living
together are like-mind (sexual, stealing, lying, drugs/alcohol/smoking) they
will seek to act out their desires/passions together. Even the most
well-trained, well-educated doctors are stumped when it comes to this 'acting out'. (See </span><span class="WPEmphasis" style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;"><i>The Boy Who Was Raised As A Dog</i></span><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;"> by Dr. Bruce Perry)
What discipline can you exact to drive the message home that this behavior or
attitude is unacceptable in the 'home' or in society for that matter? And if
the 'parents', be it foster or group home/orphanage, are always changing, then so are
the conditions for acceptable behavior vs. punishable behavior. Yikes! So much
to process in theory as well as practicality.</span><o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span class="WPEmphasis"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><i>Except the Lord build the house, they labour in vain that
build it.</i> <span style="font-size: xx-small;">Psalm 127</span></span></span><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span class="WPEmphasis"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><br /></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">As
Christians, the first thing that must be addressed regarding this entire issue biblically is the question: What is the Lord's desire regarding
orphans/fatherless?! Historically, it is documented that first century
Christians took it upon themselves to care for the abandoned children and to
appoint church leaders to oversee their care and placement in a Christian
family to be taught the things of Christ. (</span><span class="WPEmphasis" style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;"><i>The Atheism of the Early Church, </i></span><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">R.J. Rushdoony</span><span class="WPEmphasis"><span style="font-size: 10.0pt;"> </span></span><span class="WPEmphasis"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">and <i>The Rise of Christianity,</i></span></span><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">W.H.C. Frend</span><span class="WPEmphasis"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">) </span></span><span class="crartmo"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">This tradition can be seen today in part with Crisis
Pregnancy Centers, foster care systems, orphanages/children’s homes, and
adoption agencies. Unfortunately, the Church to a very large extent has given
up the responsibility to the State. (It is a travesty!) Yet the Lord has and is
raising up individuals who still believe in <i>James 1:27 </i>through adoption
agencies, foster care homes, and adoption. However, ground could also be
recovered with group homes playing an integral part of God's plan if it is a
place where children will be 'taught of the Lord'.</span></span></div>
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<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span class="WPEmphasis"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><i>A father of the fatherless...God setteth the solitary in
families. </i></span></span><span class="crartmo"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="font-size: xx-small;">Psalms 68:5-6 </span></span></span><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span class="crartmo"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><br /></span></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span class="crartmo"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">We truly believe the ultimate goal of the Lord is for
orphaned/abandoned children (whether by parent's death or termination of
rights) to be in Christian families through adoption. This again is where group
homes and foster care could play a very active role! Children coming into the 'system' have
months, if not years, of waiting for parental-rights to be terminated, thereby
making them available for adoption. In this interim period, the child can be in
a situation where they are taught of the Lord through scriptures, counseled
based on biblical principals (</span></span><span class="WPEmphasis"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;"><i>How To Help People Change, </i></span></span><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">Jay E. Adams</span><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">), and instructed in appropriate forms of behavior and
attitude (</span><i style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">The Heart of Anger</i><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">, Lou Proilo) </span><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">before entering a family permanently. This is also a time when the
children can be 'screened' for their 'desire' to be placed in a family; not all
children </span><i style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">want</i><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;"> to be adopted and </span><i style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">not</i><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;"> all children want to grow up </span><i style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">without</i><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;"> loving and supportive parents.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Hope
this is of use to you.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">In
His Service,<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Bob and Katherine
Sanford<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
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<br /></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
Robert and Katherinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03658174516021661130noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2947078923442767815.post-71180252761746818192012-09-20T11:14:00.000-07:002012-09-20T13:26:58.128-07:00<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"><i>While upon this sea of life </i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"><i> be it tumultuous or calm...</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"><i>may your Truth</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"><i> be our compass</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"><i><br /></i></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"><i>may your Word</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"><i> be our rudder</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"><i><br /></i></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"><i>may your Wisdom</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"><i> be our helm</i></span><br />
<i style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: xx-large;"><br /></i>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"><i>may your Spirit </i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"><i> be our sail</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"><i><br /></i></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"><i>may your Son </i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"><i> be our North Star.</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"><i><br /></i></span>
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace; font-size: x-large;"><i><br /></i></span>
<br />
<br />
15MAR2010<br />
<br />Robert and Katherinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03658174516021661130noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2947078923442767815.post-17951319011397006322012-08-21T15:30:00.000-07:002012-08-21T15:30:08.707-07:00Surprised By Sin<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i><span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 115%;">For all have sinned… </span></i><span style="font-size: 9.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Romans 2:23<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 9.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 115%;">It felt as
if my whole body was on fire! My chest burned, my heart raced, my throat
constricted raising the pitch of my voice. With clinched hands and tense
muscles, I was beginning to shake. Adrenalin was coursing through my body
producing a ‘fight’ response. What triggered this acute reaction? My 11 year
old daughter! She was repeatedly denying her actions of disobedience though she
had been caught in the very act. Lie upon lie ensued; spoken with a calm
monotone voice and only after prompting her out of silence to my questions with
threats of punishment.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 115%;">What had
happened to me has a very singular and short name, it was rage! I had never
experienced this phenomenon in my entire 37 years at the time. Nor had I ever
seen it exhibited by anyone else except in movies and that by the ‘bad guy’. Yet there it was in its full ugliness and control.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 115%;">I wish I
could say that first occurrence of rage was my last but then I would be lying; which
is the very thing that initiated the response in my heart the first time! There
is just nothing like asking a child a question, especially a reasonable
question, to have them continually lie; skirting the initial question with
randomly related, but slightly off subject, answers. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Everyday
became a battle for survival, not for basic needs like food, clothes, and
shelter, those were ever present, but for sanity! Every moment I was on point,
watching for lies, manipulation, and deception. Fighting to keep my wits as
children, who had spent 3, 8, and 11 years perfecting these sins, easily
maneuvered around our family expectations and boundaries without remorse or
sorrow.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 115%;">It didn’t
start out like that. It was an exciting day. The Lord had already blessed us
with three wonderful birth-children and, just three weeks prior, a darling 2 ½
year old baby girl placed in our home for ‘foster to adopt’…three weeks of
heavenly adoption bliss! So when the call came that three sisters needed an
immediate ‘foster to adopt’ placement due to disruption, it seemed another perfect gift from God </span><span style="font-size: 19px; line-height: 21px;">(after a family meeting with much prayer) </span><span style="font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">to welcome these
girls into our home and family.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 115%;">They arrived
by van. The youngest jumped out eager to give her new ‘twin’ sister a picture
she had drawn. The middle child followed close behind with the oldest slow to
climb out of the back seat of the vehicle and into the circle of this new
family standing on the front yard of her new home. The girls enjoyed the tour
of the house, the look of their new bedroom, and the pizza we had for dinner.
They seemed to settle right into the workings of our family and the next two
weeks were a pleasant time of discovery; them learning us and we learning much
about them. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 115%;">I am not
sure how or what started it, but within a month, our home had become a
battleground. We could have sent the girls away as we were still in the
six-month waiting period, but we knew God wanted them to be our daughters. So
the battles raged day in and day out. Then it happened. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 115%;">It was so
simple. During family worship, Dad was reading aloud from Proverbs when the
truth hit…he was reading about our daughters. Then the next bombshell hit, this
behavior is not new, it was not adoption related or past abuse/neglect related,
it was sin related! And not only was it our daughters’ sin but ours as well
that was perpetuating all these behaviors!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i><span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 115%;">And ye shall know the truth, and the
truth shall make you free</span></i><span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 115%;">. </span><span style="font-size: 9.0pt; line-height: 115%;">John 8:32</span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 9.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 115%;">It did not
happen overnight and it did not happen without set-backs, but there we were, peace
filling our home and children living in happy obedience (most of the time, they
are still kids!).<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 115%;">How did it
happen? We believed God. We peeled the layers of our child’s heart back, found
the lie and replaced it with truth. We sought to live faithful lives as
examples of the truth of scripture in front of and with our children (most of
the time, we are still sinners!). And we trusted God that He would bless it
(Psalm 128) which He has abundantly! <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Now we are
no longer surprised by sin, in ourselves or our children. Instead we understand,
by God’s grace and through the Word, what is happening in all of our hearts. No
surprise there, <i>The heart is deceitful
above all things, and desperately wicked: who can know it? </i></span><span style="font-size: 9.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Jeremiah 17:9<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 9.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><br /></span></div>
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</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 115%;">And thankfully,
the Lord (who is never surprised by sin) gives us something to strive for
complete with an assurance….<i>let us not
love in word, neither in tongue; but in deed and in truth. And hereby we know
that we are of the truth, and shall assure our hearts before him. For if our
heart condemn us, God is greater than our heart, and knoweth all things. Beloved,
if our heart condemn us not, then have we confidence toward God. </i></span><span style="font-size: 9.0pt; line-height: 115%;">1 John 3:18-21<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 115%;">It is a
beautiful thing. It is a humbling thing. It is our obligation as a command from
the Lord to ‘teach it to our children’. We are very glad we do.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
Psalm 128<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
Blessed
is every one that feareth the Lord; that walketh in his ways. <o:p></o:p></div>
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For thou shalt eat the labour of thine
hands: happy shalt thou be,<o:p></o:p></div>
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and it shall be well with thee.<o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: center;">
Thy wife shall be as a fruitful vine by
the sides of thine house:<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: center;">
thy children like olive plants round
about thy table.<o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
Behold,
that thus shall the man be blessed that feareth the Lord.<o:p></o:p></div>
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The Lord shall bless thee out of Zion:<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: center;">
and thou shalt see the good of Jerusalem
all the days of thy life.<o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
Yea,
thou shalt see thy children's children, and peace upon Israel.<o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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For Him,</div>
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Katherine (with Bob)</div>
Robert and Katherinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03658174516021661130noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2947078923442767815.post-63063089290680918872012-04-13T15:26:00.000-07:002012-04-13T15:55:39.265-07:00Before there was blogging......there was journaling.<br />
<br />
It was 14 years ago when the Lord so heavily burden my heart to adopt that every song, every sermon, every movie seemed to cry out, 'adopt a child'! My husband was not so burdened and had no problem sleeping at night with this decision. For months, I would randomly bring up to him this burden and dream of adopting which had been planted as a seed in my heart at the age of 12 but had now grown into a tree desiring to bear fruit. He would patiently (and not so patiently at times) listen to my plea, but the answer was usually the same...."We don't have the money."<br />
<br />
Foster care to adopt had never been considered as an option, mostly because we knew nothing about it. But one day the Lord had me discover a full-page ad in the newspaper sharing the number of 'available children' for adoption and how to proceed. I was sold, it would cost nothing. My husband was less than impressed, but God was working in his heart. On July 4th, after another, "but why not?" from me on the front steps of our 'miracle home' (that is a story for another time), he turned, took me in his arms, looked me in the eyes and said, "I love you. I will not stand in the way of your dream. It is time for me to grow-up and this will help."<br />
<br />
I wrote in my journal July 7, 1998:<br />
"My heart is full because the first hurtle in my prayer to you for adoption has been crossed...(my husband's words written above were here)...To you all Glory and Praise. Lord, now I commend to you this process. Lead us, prepare us, and bless us with the children you want us to have. Give us strength in our marriage and ourselves to face this trial till the adoption is complete. We do this with your Kingdom in mind. For all will pass away except those souls who know and serve you. Father, my earnest prayer is that <u>all</u> our children become believers. May Bob and I accept the challenge to be faithful parents. Sold out to you, totally convicted and committed. Lord, please don't let them turn from you. Grab their hearts and that of their spouses and keep them focused on you. Teach us how to lead this brood. I pray for Joshua, Taylor (Garrison), and Melinda to turn to you and be dependent on you. For our children to come, I pray acceptance of us as their parents and family, and acceptance of you as their Lord and Savior. Jesus, suffer these little children to come unto you. Use us as the vessel for your work in their lives. To you, Lord Jesus, all glory, honor, and praise. Amen."<br />
<br />
<br />
Thus began our adoption journey which I have been journaling for 14 years. Over the next days and weeks, I will be 'blogging' many of these journal entries. May they be a blessing and an encouragement to all who read them!<br />
<br />
Blessings,<br />
Katherine<br />
<br />
<br />
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<br />Robert and Katherinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03658174516021661130noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2947078923442767815.post-61607779688030222752012-04-13T14:13:00.000-07:002012-04-13T14:13:06.678-07:00What was she thinking?<i>(Editors note: These are the thoughts and opinions of our daughter regarding a well-known adoption book. The title and author have been removed as truly the book itself is not the point of sharing this discourse. It is our desire for other adoptive parents to have a glimpse into the heart and mind of a RAD child who has been raised in a Christian family for 13 years and is loved by her parents though she does not love them back. What we hope you discover is, though she will not embrace our God, she has embraced many principles we teach. And though we admit she has an angry tone to her discourse, it is the first time we were able to see her true heart regarding her position on adoption.)</i><br />
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A few days ago I was sitting in the living room, bored and unsure of what to do next. I happened to glance at the bookshelf full of adoption books, collected over the years of my parents adoption career. An idea hit. I thought it might be interesting to read one and find out what people thought of, and taught about adoption. Being a fifteen year old adoptee, I've been through the process and have culminated many ideas of my own. I shared the idea with my mom and she gave me a book by...(Editors note: title and author have been removed.) Mom said she'd be interested to know what I though of it and I was too.<br />
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So, I took a seat and began to read. What I found in that small book, completely surprised and frustrated me. I couldn't believe some of the things she was writing! When I told Mom some of my frustration, she suggested that, since I'm a writer, I take notes. So I did. I've come up with 20 different areas where I disagree with author, and I've used my past experiences to come up with the following 20 points.<br />
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Point #1. The first thing that caught my attention in this book, was the way the author referred to the kids with RAD or reactive attachment disorder. (Just as a side note, I'm a RAD child!) She calls them (us) disturbed, ab-normal, sick, un-healthy, and more, as if we were aliens from Mars or kids with some kind of disease. RAD isn't a disease! She also says that other kids (most likely one that aren't adopted) are healthy and normal! I bet she never even considered that a birth-child has just as much chance of being a 'RAD child', as an adopted kid does! But seriously! Going around telling people that their kid is sick in the head because they don't love you, will only cause that kid to resent you all the more. Has she ever considered that if you actually treated your child like a normal person (yet still kept boundaries to make sure they don't disobey) they might actually step up to the plate and prove themselves? A kid who knows you think of them as animals won't even bother trying to earn your respect; you've already proved what you think of them.<br />
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Point #2. You do NOT need a therapist! The author implied that one was absolutely necessary, but I completely disagree! Seriously people! Your child is just learning to attach to you as their parents and you go and throw in a therapist who knows nothing about your kid or your family, and you think it's going to help? If you need a therapist to raise your so-called 'sick' kids, then why don't you need a therapist to train your other 'healthy' children? The therapist is the professional, so they should obviously be the ones raising your kids, because you are totally under-qualified! You don't have a degree in psychology, so you can't possible know how to train your own children! Really? That's just crazy!<br />
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Point #3. Just because a child wasn't loved from birth, does not mean that they are incapable of showing love! Try applying that logic elsewhere. For example, let's say that from your child's birth to their third year, you didn't once show anger or frustration towards him. Does that now mean that your child is completely incapable of showing anger themselves? You wish! Just because your child (either adopted or birth) refuses to love you, does not mean they are incapable. Have you considered that your child might refuse to bond with you simple because he is a bratty little kid? Just a thought.<br />
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Point #4. I noticed that the author often said not to ask the question why, and merely focused on outward behavior only. I believe that simply focusing on the exterior behavior of your child and ignoring the 'why' (editors note: heart) is ridiculous! If you never get to the core of why something is happening (temper-tantrums, etc.) how will you ever stop it? Sure, if your kid throws-up, for instance, and you make them clean it up, in time, they may stop throwing-up purposefully. And, if your goal is to simply stop the outward behavior, then congratulations! You did it! But if your purpose is to find <u>why</u> your child is doing something, merely making them clean it up is not going to help.<br />
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Point #5. I found that the author thought it necessary that parents attend some sort of training session before attempting to train their child. I find nothing wrong with seeking advice from those more learned than yourself, but to say that it's necessary? Each child is different, and therefore you might have to slightly tweak your training for each. The government doesn't know your kids! That's why they're <u>your</u> children in the first place!<br />
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Point #6. The author often referred to the parents as 'awesome' and 'powerful'. While I agree that you as parents deserve your child's honor and obedience, that doesn't mean your kid is going to like it. By telling you you're awesome beings, deserving of praise, the author is bordering on saying you're the master and your child's your slave. In a technical sense, the slave-master relationship is true. But if the goal is to gain the heart of your child, telling them to treat you like a mini-god is not the best of ideas.<br />
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Point #7. Something I found crazy about the author, is she says saying "Yes, ma'am" or "No, sir" makes a kid feel unwanted. Excuse me? I've been saying "Yes, sir" to my dad for the past thirteen years and not once have I felt 'un-wanted' because of it. It implanted in my mind the fact that my parents are in-charge and I am to respect them.<br />
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Point #8. Another thing I found crazy is all the talk about schedules, especially with the author's so-called 'snuggle-time'. It's not scheduled! It just happens! When living in the midst of a family, snuggle-time or one-on-one conversations aren't <u>planned</u> for 'such-and-such a time on next Tuesday'. Seriously! Life isn't lived by the clock or your calendar.<br />
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Point #9. When you prepare a meal, your child eats it! They don't get sent away to have 'quiet-time' because they refused to eat. Even if they don't like what your serve, you still have to make them <u>at least</u> eat another few bites to prove that they <u>MUST</u> obey you. Don't give them control!<br />
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Point #10. When your child develops a habit (such as hiding food, which the author discusses), do you honestly think by <u>giving</u> them food to hide you're going to help them? They will only think you approve of what they are doing!<br />
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Point #11. When your child continues to throw-up their meal, you have to ask yourself, are they really sick? Or is something else going on? Children who have been starved and underfed will probably resort to stuffing themselves until they are sick. But guess what? If you serve regular meals and make raiding the kitchen against the rules, your child will have no chance to gorge themselves! And when they continue throwing-up, even after the above precautions? Go deeper, Have you ever thought maybe (just maybe) your child has a wicked heart and simply throws-up because they aren't getting their way? Really guys! You can trust me on this one; I have experience!<br />
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Point #12. Telling your child not to ask curiosity questions is not a good idea. Questions are a way of communication. When your child engages you (of his/her own free will) to ask a question is normally a good thing.<br />
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Point #13. When a child throws a fit, you <u>NEVER</u> just let them do it or even play along! Can't you see that you are only encouraging them? Also, alone time isn't always the best idea. If you don't fight for your child <u>through</u> their emotions, they won't respect you. If you leave them to themselves, their will only get angrier and harder as they convince themselves that they are in the right.<br />
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Point #14. Saying that your child won't trust you because you spank them is ridiculous! If you tell them you're going to spank them when they disobey, then spank them. Oh my word! They won't trust you because you actually kept your word?!<br />
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Point #15. Okay, saying a kid won't have friends until they attach to their parents is so wrong! I had the exact opposite problem. I had great relationships with friends and even strangers, but I hated being with my parents. I <u>do</u> agree that a child should develop an attachment to their parents, first and foremost. But saying that they are incapable of making friends until that happens is completely wrong.<br />
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Point #16. I don't believe it's a must for a child to receive 'eight hugs a day' as the author puts it. "Touch is so vital, humans actually die without it." Are you serious? I rarely get touched and I'm alive! You could hug your kid <u>ALL DAY LONG,</u> and they will never change! I do agree that you should hug your children. But as a teenager, I'd prefer a one-on-one conversation any day. It could vary between children. But to say touch is vital for survival with all children is not exactly right. Again, trust me, I have experience!<br />
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Point #17. To say that homeschooling your RAD kid will only make your bonding harder is just crazy! If you're trying to bond with your child, one of the <u>BEST WAYS</u> to do that is by homeschooling. This is because they are with <u>you</u> all day, not some teacher who they don't know. Homeschooling gives you the opportunity to spend as much time with your child as possible. And it also gives you, as the parent, control over exactly what your child is learning.<br />
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Point #18. I <u>completely</u> disagree with giving your daughter birth-control pills! That's crazy! You're teaching your child in the course of their life not to steal, lie...or kill. And then you just go and give your daughter a pill that murders! Despite what you may call it, it <u>is</u> murder, and you've just undone all the teaching you've given on the preservation of life! If they have your full consent (and even help) to fornicate and then murder a child, (Editors note: she means through abortion of possible zygote, the fertilized egg.) how can you tell them not to murder another person? How can you say one is right and the other is wrong, when they are technically the same thing?<br />
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Point #19. I agree that you shouldn't always dwell in the past, but saying that bringing up past mistakes (not even past trauma) is traumatizing? Perhaps for some. But I believe that looking back on past mistakes can help you in the present. If your kid sees the consequences of that past decision, they may choose to do differently the next time. I also think it's encouraging to look back and see how far you've come. It makes you feel as if you're progressing instead of being bogged down in the same old stuff.<br />
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Point #20. As my final point, I think it's important to say, I don't think keeping a relationship with your child's birth-family is a good idea. When they make the transition from that family to yours, they are letting go of their old family. Besides, if your child's biological family is giving them up to you, then the obviously don't care enough about the child to do what it takes to care for them. So, since they don't want their own child, I don't think you should remain in contact or fellowship with them.<br />
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Conclusion. Over all, I believe the author has a good motive for writing her book; wanting to help families with RAD kids. But I believe she goes about it from the completely wrong side. Not to be disrespectful, but from some of the things she writes, you'd think she knew next-to-nothing about adopted kids with RAD. Being one myself (a RAD kid and adopted) I know a lot about the things she speaks on and I also know how wrongly she portrays them. Yes, love your kids! But to say hug more, talk less? If I had to choose one thing in the past thirteen years of my adopted life which helped me most, it would be the conversations I've had with my parents.<br />
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The End<br />
January 2012<br />
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<br />Robert and Katherinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03658174516021661130noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2947078923442767815.post-1486596571241686282012-01-26T09:29:00.000-08:002012-01-26T09:29:57.678-08:00Blessing the most High God<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><i>I blessed the most High, and I praised and honoured him that liveth for ever, whose dominion is an everlasting dominion, and his kingdom is from generation to generation: And all the inhabitants of the earth are reputed as nothing; and he doeth according to his will...among the inhabitants of the earth: and none can stay his hand, or say unto him, What doest thou?" Daniel 4:34-35</i></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">In these two verses Nebuchadnezzar preaches and declares the simple truth of the sovereignty of God. He had just spent 7 years living as a beast in the field - separated from his kingdom and the company of man - for speaking these very few words:</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><i>Is not this great Babylon, that I have built by the might of my power and for the honor of my majesty? Daniel 4:30</i></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">God had warned him in a dream, interpreted by Daniel (Dan. 4: 24-27), that it was to come to past and it did twelve months later. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">God warns us in his word of his curses and he declares in his word his blessings. Though they may seem slow to come by man's reckoning, God's word is true and comes true in his timing. It is our responsibility to not grow weary in the wait nor turn to ourselves (or idols of our choosing) for comfort or exaltation. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Yet how beautiful it is that though we go through dark times, are separated from all that is comfortable and familiar - like</span> <span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Nebuchadnezzar because of our choices or like </span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Job by God allowance - God is the great restorer! He loves his children and will use those times of chastisement or suffering to cleanse our hearts and sharpen them for his kingdom purposes. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The Lord promises to never leave us or forsake us; however, faith untried is not real faith. And a saint left to himself and self-exalting is not a saint until he is tried in the fire and emerges "blessing the most High God."</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">It is not our trials that define us, it is our joy to give God "praise and honor" at the deliverance from those trials that sets us apart as one belonging to His Kingdom!</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Blessed be the Most High!</span><br />
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</i></span>Robert and Katherinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03658174516021661130noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2947078923442767815.post-37740300095829026682011-03-15T16:16:00.000-07:002011-03-15T20:21:20.261-07:00'I Thought' Syndrome<div align="center"><span style="font-size: 85%;"><em>But <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">Naaman</span> was wroth, and went away, and said, Behold, I thought, He will surely come out to me, and stand, and call on the name of the Lord his God, and strike his hand over the place, and recover the leper.</em> 2 Kings 5:11</span></div><div align="center"><span style="font-size: 85%;"></span></div><div align="center"><span style="font-size: 85%;"></span></div><br />
<div align="left"><span style="font-size: 85%;">"I thought..." How many times have we spoken or heard those words to only have them complicate a situation? Our thoughts, despite what our pride leads us to believe, are often immaterial to what needs to happen especially for the Christian. In II kings 5 is the story of a man who had to discover what he thought served only himself and not the greater purpose of trusting and obeying God.</span></div><div align="left"><span style="font-size: 85%;"></span></div><br />
<div align="left"><span style="font-size: 85%;"><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1">Naaman</span> was a valiant and mighty man, captain of the host of the king of Syria; yet, he had a problem, a disease called leprosy. A young girl taken captive from Israel tells her mistress of a prophet in Samaria who could heal her husband <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_2">Naaman</span>. <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_3">Naaman</span> is told of this hopeful news. He approaches his king with the girl's story. The king of Syria granted permission for <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_4">Naaman</span> to go to the prophet and give him a letter of introduction to the king of Israel. <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_5">Naaman</span> went to Israel laden with gifts of silver, gold, and ten sets of clothes. After going by way of the king of Israel, who had a very wrong impression of the letter, <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_6">Naaman</span> finally pulls up in front of Elisha's home. We can only speculate, but <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_7">Naaman</span> was probably hoping against hope this would work. He comes to Elisha with all kinds of grandeur and huge amounts of payment. It appears as though he is expecting to impress the prophet with his wealth and status. <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_8">Naaman</span> wanted this to be full of pomp and circumstance, splendor and glory for him. Yet, Elisha never even comes out to see <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_9">Naaman</span>. He only sends word to tell <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_10">Naaman</span> what to do to be healed; it was not even that spectacular of a cure. In fact, it was repulsive to <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_11">Naaman</span>. Go dip in the water of the Jordan River seven times! <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_12">Naaman</span> was angry and he speaks those immortal words, "I thought...."</span></div><div align="left"><span style="font-size: 85%;"></span></div><br />
<div align="left"><span style="font-size: 85%;">How often do we set things up in our mind which is nothing of God's plan? We process, analysis, and legitimize our ideas, our expectations, even our dreams to have God thwart them with something totally simple, totally out of the ordinary, which totally never crossed our mind. <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_13">Naaman</span> was a captain of the entire Syrian army. He was accustomed to pageantry and ceremony. He was a man who was used to being bowed down to, exalting his position. <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_14">Naaman</span> expected Elisha to come out to meet him and marvel at his gifts then to call upon the Lord waving his hands over the spot of leprosy thereby healing him. What a jolt to <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_15">Naaman's</span> ego, Elisha did not even come tot the door but sent a servant with a very simple and quick message. This prophet did nothing <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_16">Naaman</span> thought he would do; therefore, he wanted to abandon the whole idea and go home. Thankfully for us the story does not stop there. <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_17">Naaman</span> had wise servants who were not blinded by prestige or wealth. They convinced the great and mighty <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_18">Naaman</span> to do the simple thing...obey the prophet.</span></div><br />
<div align="left"><span style="font-size: 85%;">We may fancy ourselves to be great and mighty Christians since we adopted; then tragedy, disappointment, or troubles arise. We go to God in prayer, fasting, good works, and sacrifice, but nothing changes. God says, in the daily burdens and trials of parenting our challenging adopted children, 'trust and obey', we balk; it's to simple, not enough pomp and circumstance. He says, 'suffer the little children to come unto me', we bristle; there is too much suffering, not enough splendor. And He says 'do good to those who hate you', we rage; it requires too much self-dying, not enough glory. You may say, look haven't we been faithful? We tithe 10% of our income, we <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_19">home school</span> our children, we do family worship, we wear modest clothing, dad leads faithfully and mom submits happily (well, at least both of us try), we eat healthy food (at least mostly), we adopted a child just like you did us, and the list of works goes on. </span></div><div align="left"><span style="font-size: 85%;"></span></div><br />
<div align="left"><span style="font-size: 85%;">I thought...we would be blessed and exalted, not persecuted by our family and friends.</span></div><br />
<div align="left"><span style="font-size: 85%;"></span></div><div align="left"><span style="font-size: 85%;">I thought...if we obeyed James 1:27 life would be easy and successful, not full of sorrow and suffering.</span></div><br />
<div align="left"><span style="font-size: 85%;"></span></div><div align="left"><span style="font-size: 85%;">I thought...if we obeyed Deuteronomy 6 our children would not rebel, breaking our hearts. </span></div><br />
<div align="left"><span style="font-size: 85%;"></span></div><div align="left"><span style="font-size: 85%;"></span></div><div align="left"><span style="font-size: 85%;">The wisdom of Scripture answers with:</span></div><div align="left"><span style="font-size: 85%;"><em>Blessed are you when they revile and persecute you, and say all kinds of evil against you falsely for My sake.</em> Matthew 5:11</span></div><br />
<div align="left"><span style="font-size: 85%;"></span></div><div align="left"><span style="font-size: 85%;"><em>Though He was a Son, yet He learned obedience by the things which He suffered.</em> Hebrews 5:8</span></div><br />
<div align="left"><span style="font-size: 85%;"></span></div><div align="left"><span style="font-size: 85%;"><em>And they that know thy name will put their trust in thee: for thou, Lord, hast not forsaken them that seek thee. </em>Psalm 9:10</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: 85%;">Did you catch that, we are blessed, learning obedience, and God knows us! These are not meant to be panaceas for deep and real hurting pain, but only to expound upon the point; no matter what we are facing. or troubled with, the Lord only wants us to do the simple thing, trust Him and obey His commandments. God's ways are not our ways. He will never glorify the man, only his Son. <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_20">Naaman</span> humbled himself, obeyed the prophet, and dipped in the Jordan River seven times. We can only wonder if at each coming up out of the water whether his servants saw a change in his skin or if it was not until the coming up out of the water on the seventh dip. Either way <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_21">Naaman</span> was healed. His obedience made his skin fresh and new like that of a young child.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: 85%;">This same principle works for us today as well. When we obey our Lord as he has set forth in his Word, our heart, relationships, and vision is made fresh and new. Our leprous sin is removed upon his healing <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_22">Naaman</span> became an ardent worshipper of God. We, too, when we obey cannot help but worship the Lord.</span><br />
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<span style="font-size: 85%;">We must try to refrain from the 'I thought' syndrome and teach our children the dangers of it as well. What if <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_23">Naaman</span> had stomped off when things did not go as he thought? What if he had not listened to the wise counsel of his servants? Pride has a way of exalting us to a level above the simple answer and above godly advice. We must humble ourselves and judge our obedience not by fame, wealth, health, or prestige, but by keeping our eyes on Christ no matter what is going on around us. If the eyes of faith drop, with suffering, trials, or even blessings, then anger or a sense of betrayal may come and the 'I thought' syndrome follows. <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_24">Naaman</span> learned there was a God in Israel who could do wondrous things. No doubt he shared this news with others. Let us do the same. And when we hear ourselves saying, "I thought..." let the wise counsel of the Word of God by the power of the Holy Spirit speak to our heart, "<em>For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, saith the Lord. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts."</em> <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_25">Isaiah</span> 55:8-9</span></div><div align="left"></div><div align="left"></div><div align="left"></div><div align="left"></div><div align="left"></div><div align="left"></div><div align="left"></div>Robert and Katherinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03658174516021661130noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2947078923442767815.post-79416850128536691322010-10-12T14:10:00.000-07:002010-10-12T14:27:10.913-07:00A New Name<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top:5.0pt;margin-right:0in;margin-bottom:5.0pt; margin-left:0in;tab-stops:0in .5in 1.0in 1.5in 2.0in 2.5in 3.0in 3.5in 4.0in 4.5in 5.0in 5.5in 6.0in"><span class="WPEmphasis1"><span style="font-size:10.0pt; font-family:"Arial","sans-serif";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"">And thou shalt be called by </span></span><span class="WPStrong1"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style:normal"><span style="font-size:10.0pt;font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"">a new </span></i></span><span class="WPStrong1"><span style="font-size:10.0pt;font-family:"Arial","sans-serif"; mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"">name</span></span><span style="font-size:10.0pt;font-family:"Arial","sans-serif";mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">,<i style="mso-bidi-font-style:normal"> which the mouth of the LORD shall name. Thou shalt also be a crown of glory in the hand of the Lord, and a royal diadem in the hand of thy God. Thou shalt no more be termed Forsaken. <span style="mso-tab-count:1"> </span>Isaiah 62:2b-4a</i></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top:5.0pt;margin-right:0in;margin-bottom:5.0pt; margin-left:0in;tab-stops:0in .5in 1.0in 1.5in 2.0in 2.5in 3.0in 3.5in 4.0in 4.5in 5.0in 5.5in 6.0in"><span style="font-size:10.0pt;font-family:"Arial","sans-serif";mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman""><i style="mso-bidi-font-style:normal"></i></span><span class="WPEmphasis1"><span style="font-size:10.0pt;font-family:"Arial","sans-serif"; mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"">To him that overcometh will I give to eat of the hidden manna, and will give him a white stone, and in the stone </span></span><span class="WPStrong1"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style:normal"><span style="font-size: 10.0pt;font-family:"Arial","sans-serif";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"">a new name</span></i></span><span class="WPEmphasis1"><span style="font-size:10.0pt; font-family:"Arial","sans-serif";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman""> written, which no man knoweth saving he that receiveth it.</span></span><span style="font-size:10.0pt;font-family:"Arial","sans-serif";mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman""> <span style="mso-tab-count:1"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style:normal">Revelation 2:17b</i></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top:5.0pt;margin-right:0in;margin-bottom:5.0pt; margin-left:0in;tab-stops:0in .5in 1.0in 1.5in 2.0in 2.5in 3.0in 3.5in 4.0in 4.5in 5.0in 5.5in 6.0in"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; "><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top:5.0pt;margin-right:0in;margin-bottom:5.0pt; margin-left:0in;tab-stops:0in .5in 1.0in 1.5in 2.0in 2.5in 3.0in 3.5in 4.0in 4.5in 5.0in 5.5in 6.0in"><span style="font-size:10.0pt;font-family:"Arial","sans-serif";mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman""><i style="mso-bidi-font-style:normal"></i></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; ">Imagine it. God gives us <span class="WPEmphasis1"><span style="font-family:"Arial","sans-serif"; mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"">a new name</span></span> when He adopts us. Most will not hear that new name until Christ calls them by it in heaven but what joy it will be to hear and even recognize it as ours. During their earthly journey, Abraham, Israel, Peter, and Paul are examples of some who received new names upon their encounter with the Lord. It was a calling out of these men to greater work then they had ever done before. Even the Son of God upon His earthly birth received a new name revealed by an angel to his mother and adoptive father. It was not 'I AM' as it had always been, but "thou shalt call his name Jesus" was God's command.</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top:5.0pt;margin-right:0in;margin-bottom:5.0pt; margin-left:0in;tab-stops:0in .5in 1.0in 1.5in 2.0in 2.5in 3.0in 3.5in 4.0in 4.5in 5.0in 5.5in 6.0in"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; "></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; ">When we gave a new name to our adopted child it created, and immediately enhanced, the bond and identification of being a part of our family. This <span class="WPEmphasis1"><span style="font-family:"Arial","sans-serif";mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">new name</span></span> was the beginning of teaching them that they were a "new creation" in Christ, even before they were saved. It taught them to "lay up for themselves treasure in heaven," not treasures of this world. It declared to them that they have a future not incumbent upon their past.</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top:5.0pt;margin-right:0in;margin-bottom:5.0pt; margin-left:0in;tab-stops:0in .5in 1.0in 1.5in 2.0in 2.5in 3.0in 3.5in 4.0in 4.5in 5.0in 5.5in 6.0in"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; "></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; ">A <span class="WPEmphasis1"><span style="font-family:"Arial","sans-serif"; mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"">name</span></span> gives value and blessing. How much you value something determines how or if you will name it. When our four children came from Russia, we gave them teddy bears. We asked them what the bear's name was and they looked totally perplexed. Name a toy! Why? It had no value. This was something they had to learn to do. We taught them to add 'value' to their belongings and claim them as their own just as we had given them names to claim them as our own. </span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top:5.0pt;margin-right:0in;margin-bottom:5.0pt; margin-left:0in;tab-stops:0in .5in 1.0in 1.5in 2.0in 2.5in 3.0in 3.5in 4.0in 4.5in 5.0in 5.5in 6.0in"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; ">When we adopted our two sister beagles, we chose names for them to reflect our family's old fashion names. So they went from being Lucky and Clover to being <span class="WPEmphasis1"><span style="font-family:"Arial","sans-serif";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"">our dogs</span></span> named Gertie and Betsy. Also, many people will name their cars. Our fifteen passenger van is called Mike and our 6x8 travel trailer is named Charlie.</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top:5.0pt;margin-right:0in;margin-bottom:5.0pt; margin-left:0in;tab-stops:0in .5in 1.0in 1.5in 2.0in 2.5in 3.0in 3.5in 4.0in 4.5in 5.0in 5.5in 6.0in"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; ">When a parent names a child it gives them identity, a sense of purpose and worth. It is a form of blessing them as only a true parent can. We do not know why our children were given their birth-names though we think they are beautiful. But we can always emphatically state to them why they have their given-names from us. A powerful tool when calling a child out to be a godly man or woman!</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top:5.0pt;margin-right:0in;margin-bottom:5.0pt; margin-left:0in;tab-stops:0in .5in 1.0in 1.5in 2.0in 2.5in 3.0in 3.5in 4.0in 4.5in 5.0in 5.5in 6.0in"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; "></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; ">The feelings of abandonment and isolation from the natural order of life (a mother caring for her child) are present in every adopted child from the new born infant to the married adult with their own children. It is real and foreboding. But it is not who they are! Nor is it who they will be. It is only who they were. The question is not whether they would like to be called by the <span class="WPEmphasis1"><span style="font-family:"Arial","sans-serif"; mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"">only names they have ever known </span></span>(birth-name). The question is what does their heart need? </span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top:5.0pt;margin-right:0in;margin-bottom:5.0pt; margin-left:0in;tab-stops:0in .5in 1.0in 1.5in 2.0in 2.5in 3.0in 3.5in 4.0in 4.5in 5.0in 5.5in 6.0in"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; ">They need to know in their heart that they belong to their adoptive parents as surely as if they had been born to them and that they are Christ's child. This is the Dad and Mom who had prayed for them, who opened their hearts and home to them though they were strangers, who teaches them of the providential love of God which placed them in their family and of His Kingdom purposes for their lives.</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top:5.0pt;margin-right:0in;margin-bottom:5.0pt; margin-left:0in;tab-stops:0in .5in 1.0in 1.5in 2.0in 2.5in 3.0in 3.5in 4.0in 4.5in 5.0in 5.5in 6.0in"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; "></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; ">As every Believer knows, adoption by God does not negate our past but defines it. It was ordained before time began. We are all merely living out God's plan which ultimately is to glorify Jesus. T</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; ">he child's <span class="WPEmphasis1"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; ">new name</span></span> will always remind them and testify to them of their future every time they hear it or write it. </span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top:5.0pt;margin-right:0in;margin-bottom:5.0pt; margin-left:0in;tab-stops:0in .5in 1.0in 1.5in 2.0in 2.5in 3.0in 3.5in 4.0in 4.5in 5.0in 5.5in 6.0in"><span style="font-family:"Arial","sans-serif";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"; color:black"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top:5.0pt;margin-right:0in;margin-bottom:5.0pt; margin-left:0in;tab-stops:0in .5in 1.0in 1.5in 2.0in 2.5in 3.0in 3.5in 4.0in 4.5in 5.0in 5.5in 6.0in"><span style="font-family:"Arial","sans-serif";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"; color:black"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-top:5.0pt;margin-right:0in;margin-bottom:5.0pt; margin-left:0in;tab-stops:0in .5in 1.0in 1.5in 2.0in 2.5in 3.0in 3.5in 4.0in 4.5in 5.0in 5.5in 6.0in"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; "></span><span style="font-family:"Arial","sans-serif";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"; color:black">Copyright </span><span style="color:black">© </span><span style="font-family:"Arial","sans-serif";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"; color:black">2007 Robert Sanford. All rights reserved</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination:none;tab-stops:0in .5in 1.0in 1.5in 2.0in 2.5in 3.0in 3.5in 4.0in 4.5in 5.0in 5.5in 6.0in"><span style="font-size:24.0pt;mso-bidi-font-size:10.0pt;color:black"><o:p> </o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination:none;tab-stops:0in .5in 1.0in 1.5in 2.0in 2.5in 3.0in 3.5in 4.0in 4.5in 5.0in 5.5in 6.0in"><span style="font-size:24.0pt;mso-bidi-font-size:10.0pt;color:black"><o:p> </o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination:none;tab-stops:0in .5in 1.0in 1.5in 2.0in 2.5in 3.0in 3.5in 4.0in 4.5in 5.0in 5.5in 6.0in"><span style="font-size:24.0pt;mso-bidi-font-size:10.0pt;color:black"><o:p> </o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination:none;tab-stops:0in .5in 1.0in 1.5in 2.0in 2.5in 3.0in 3.5in 4.0in 4.5in 5.0in 5.5in 6.0in"><span style="font-size:24.0pt;mso-bidi-font-size:10.0pt;color:black"><o:p> </o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination:none;tab-stops:0in .5in 1.0in 1.5in 2.0in 2.5in 3.0in 3.5in 4.0in 4.5in 5.0in 5.5in 6.0in"><span style="font-size:24.0pt;mso-bidi-font-size:10.0pt;color:black"><o:p> </o:p></span></p>Robert and Katherinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03658174516021661130noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2947078923442767815.post-19337114179375957582010-09-27T16:07:00.000-07:002010-09-27T16:23:30.271-07:00Our Reward<p class="MsoNormal" style="tab-stops:0in .5in 1.0in 1.5in 2.0in 2.5in 3.0in 3.5in 4.0in 4.5in 5.0in 5.5in 6.0in"><span class="WPEmphasis"><span style="font-family:"Arial","sans-serif";mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman""><i>Lo, children are an heritage of the LORD: and fruit of the womb is his reward....Happy is the man that hath his quiver full of them.</i> </span></span><span class="WPEmphasis"><span style="font-size:10.0pt;font-family:"Arial","sans-serif"; mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"">Psalm 127:3&5</span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="tab-stops:0in .5in 1.0in 1.5in 2.0in 2.5in 3.0in 3.5in 4.0in 4.5in 5.0in 5.5in 6.0in"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; ">How can children be a reward? Whether they are birth or adopted, children come into the world extremely selfish and demanding. And as they grow they seek harder to fulfill those selfish desires. Left to himself a child will be consumed with his selfishness and the desired fulfillment of his demands which make him anything but a reward and blessing. So what really is the blessing of having children?</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="tab-stops:0in .5in 1.0in 1.5in 2.0in 2.5in 3.0in 3.5in 4.0in 4.5in 5.0in 5.5in 6.0in"><span style="font-family:"Arial","sans-serif";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"">It goes back to the first argument of why children are not such a blessing. The problem is that in many ways, though with more restraint (hopefully), parents are also selfish and demanding of their own way. We discovered the presence of this the day after our wedding! But it was not until children came that we begin to see the depths of it. For with the child comes a battle of wills. Now spouses will have skirmishes of will but because of their love and devotion to each other and the ability to communicate intelligently (for the most part) with each other, they can usually arrive at a decision that will be satisfactory to both of them. The child comes with no such love or propensity to work things out for the benefit of all parties. He wants, what he wants, when he wants it! We may call this willful. God calls it sin.</span><span style="font-family: "Calibri","sans-serif";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman""><o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="tab-stops:0in .5in 1.0in 1.5in 2.0in 2.5in 3.0in 3.5in 4.0in 4.5in 5.0in 5.5in 6.0in"><span style="font-family:"Arial","sans-serif";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"">Children force us each day to look at the depths of our hearts and actions. As children grow older and take on our characteristics, good and bad, we are faced with a mirror of our self, and our image-bearers may not be pleasing to us. This is one way and a very major way as to why they bless us...we get to see ourselves for who we truly ar!. So if we do not want our offspring to take the same path we are on, we must change. </span><span style="font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"; mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman""><o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="tab-stops:0in .5in 1.0in 1.5in 2.0in 2.5in 3.0in 3.5in 4.0in 4.5in 5.0in 5.5in 6.0in"><span style="font-family:"Arial","sans-serif";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"">Since God's greatest desire is for us to love and serve Him with total abandon, for our sin to be real to us (not hidden) and confessed, that we live out daily the fruits of the Spirit, that we stand firm in our faith and work out our salvation, that we obey even unto death, and that the truth of the Scriptures be passed on to future generations, we are blessed with children to teach and train in the Lord. And since we always learn best when we have to teach and set an example we are truly blessed when children are given by the Lord as a reward. </span><span style="font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman""><o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="tab-stops:0in .5in 1.0in 1.5in 2.0in 2.5in 3.0in 3.5in 4.0in 4.5in 5.0in 5.5in 6.0in"><span style="font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman""><o:p> </o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination:none;tab-stops:0in .5in 1.0in 1.5in 2.0in 2.5in 3.0in 3.5in 4.0in 4.5in 5.0in 5.5in 6.0in"><span style="font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman""><o:p> </o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="tab-stops:0in .5in 1.0in 1.5in 2.0in 2.5in 3.0in 3.5in 4.0in 4.5in 5.0in 5.5in 6.0in"><span class="applestyle"><span style="font-size:10.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"; mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"">Copyright 2006 Robert Sanford, revised 2010</span></span><span style="font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman""><o:p></o:p></span></p>Robert and Katherinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03658174516021661130noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2947078923442767815.post-41009593647054103112010-09-27T15:51:00.001-07:002010-09-27T16:05:51.608-07:00The Father's Heart<p class="MsoNormal" style="tab-stops:0in .5in 1.0in 1.5in 2.0in 2.5in 3.0in 3.5in 4.0in 4.5in 5.0in 5.5in 6.0in"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; "><i>He doth execute the judgment of the fatherless and widow, and loveth the stranger, in giving him food and raiment.</i> Deuteronomy 10:18</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="tab-stops:0in .5in 1.0in 1.5in 2.0in 2.5in 3.0in 3.5in 4.0in 4.5in 5.0in 5.5in 6.0in"><span style="font-family:"Arial","sans-serif";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"">In reading through the Bible a theme begins to emerge as to the character and heart of God toward man. Not only is his great love and grace, judgment and mercy revealed, but also the kinds of people to whom he is most compassionate and to whom he commands us to do likewise, meaning widows, orphans, and strangers. <o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination:none;tab-stops:0in .5in 1.0in 1.5in 2.0in 2.5in 3.0in 3.5in 4.0in 4.5in 5.0in 5.5in 6.0in"><span style="font-family:"Arial","sans-serif";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"">Jesus displayed this truth perfectly. His compassion to strangers (non-Jews) was specifically detailed in scriptures including the Roman soldier's servant, the Gadaranes man, the Syrophonician woman's daughter, and the tenth leper. From Peter's mother-in-law to the widow of Nain to his own mother at the cross, Jesus cared for widows. He even spoke to the greatness of one widow before God in that she gave everything out of her nothing where others gave to the treasury very little compared to their great wealth. A very familiar verse, "suffer the little children to come unto me," is typically applied to mothers bringing their children to be blessed by Jesus. But as we look at the totality of scripture we understand Jesus to mean bring all children to him, i.e.: grandchildren, nieces/nephews, church children, orphans in America or overseas. Believers are to follow Jesus' example. Though we move among equals most of the time, compassion for the stranger, widows, and orphans should be a representative part of our time and interest. <o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="tab-stops:0in .5in 1.0in 1.5in 2.0in 2.5in 3.0in 3.5in 4.0in 4.5in 5.0in 5.5in 6.0in"><span style="font-family:"Arial","sans-serif";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman""><i>Know ye not that I must be about my Father's business?</i> Even at the tender age of twelve Jesus knew what he was to be about. As Believer's our call is absolutely the same. We <u>must</u> be about our Father's business. To pursue the will of the Father in one's life does not take years of prayer and Bible reading, it only takes obedience to do what the Lord has set your hand to do (duty) and to do it for His glory alone. </span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="tab-stops:0in .5in 1.0in 1.5in 2.0in 2.5in 3.0in 3.5in 4.0in 4.5in 5.0in 5.5in 6.0in"><span style="font-family:"Arial","sans-serif";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"">What does take years of practice is to die to self and live unto Christ! Yet God does not leave us without ways of working this out to the maximum. He says in James 1:27, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal">Pure religion and undefiled before God and the Father is this, to visit the fatherless and widows in their affliction, and to keep himself unspotted from the world.</i> If you want to really show God your heart is for him then you will do what is his heart. </span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="tab-stops:0in .5in 1.0in 1.5in 2.0in 2.5in 3.0in 3.5in 4.0in 4.5in 5.0in 5.5in 6.0in"><span style="font-family:"Arial","sans-serif";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"">Do not be fooled, it is by grace that we do anything, but the question is, "How much grace do you want?!" If a little grace is OK with you then just do what fits in your comfort zone. BUT if you want to have grace poured out in heaps, full to overflowing, then step out in faith and do the work of the Father. Go into prisons, and nursing homes. Host a foreign college student. Adopt a child who is fatherless, or generously finance a family who is willing to open their home to an orphan, a stranger, a child! Go into the mission field of another country or state and as you share the Gospel with these strangers, the Lord will bring to you widows and orphans for you to touch in Jesus' name. It is all about the Father's heart. <o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="tab-stops:0in .5in 1.0in 1.5in 2.0in 2.5in 3.0in 3.5in 4.0in 4.5in 5.0in 5.5in 6.0in"><span style="font-family:"Arial","sans-serif";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"">Where is your heart? God did not prosper this great Nation so that we, as Believers, could lavish 'stuff' on ourselves. He commands us in James 1:27 to keep from being polluted by that mindset. That is why in the same sentence of learning what is <u>pure</u> for a Christian (to take care of widows and orphans) we are told not to do as the world does. John Bunyan rebelled against man to obey God and was locked in prison. William Tyndale rebelled against man to obey God and was burned at the stake. This kind of martyrdom may never be our calling or fate in Christ, but we are to restrain our desires (imprison them) and to die to self, living for Christ's will only. Being a martyr to self must be an every moment decision whereby the Believer is then able to embrace God's ability through grace to do mighty deeds for his kingdom. We need to do as Isaiah and say to the Lord, "Here am I send me."<o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="tab-stops:0in .5in 1.0in 1.5in 2.0in 2.5in 3.0in 3.5in 4.0in 4.5in 5.0in 5.5in 6.0in"><span style="font-family:"Arial","sans-serif";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"">"I could never do what you do!" How many times have missionaries, pastors, adoptive parents, prison chaplains/volunteers, nursing home workers/volunteers, homeschooling families, and college student hosting families had to listen to those words, and from believers no less! And all that echoes in the heart and mind of the afore mentioned persons is, "But by the grace of God I am what I am." No one does anything for the Kingdom of God except that they stepped out in faith, trusting God's Word, and the Lord pouring out in torrents his grace upon their obedience. And where does that obedience come. It comes from a desire to do the Father's will and to live the Father's heart as revealed plainly in Scripture<span class="WPEmphasis"><span style="font-family:"Arial","sans-serif"; mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"">. </span></span><o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="tab-stops:0in .5in 1.0in 1.5in 2.0in 2.5in 3.0in 3.5in 4.0in 4.5in 5.0in 5.5in 6.0in"><span class="WPEmphasis"><span style="font-family:"Arial","sans-serif";mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman""><i>And the King shall answer and say unto them, Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me.</i> Matthew 25:40</span></span><span style="font-family:"Arial","sans-serif";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman""><o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="tab-stops:0in .5in 1.0in 1.5in 2.0in 2.5in 3.0in 3.5in 4.0in 4.5in 5.0in 5.5in 6.0in"><span style="font-family:"Arial","sans-serif";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman""><o:p> </o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination:none;tab-stops:0in .5in 1.0in 1.5in 2.0in 2.5in 3.0in 3.5in 4.0in 4.5in 5.0in 5.5in 6.0in"><span style="font-family:"Arial","sans-serif";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman""><o:p> </o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination:none;tab-stops:0in .5in 1.0in 1.5in 2.0in 2.5in 3.0in 3.5in 4.0in 4.5in 5.0in 5.5in 6.0in"><span style="font-family:"Arial","sans-serif";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman""><o:p> </o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="tab-stops:0in .5in 1.0in 1.5in 2.0in 2.5in 3.0in 3.5in 4.0in 4.5in 5.0in 5.5in 6.0in"><span class="applestyle"><span style="font-size:10.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"; mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"">Copyright 2006 Robert Sanford, revised 2010</span></span><span style="font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman""><o:p></o:p></span></p>Robert and Katherinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03658174516021661130noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2947078923442767815.post-30849991861879230472010-09-27T14:50:00.000-07:002010-09-27T15:28:47.518-07:00The Tie That Binds<p class="MsoNormal" style="tab-stops:0in .5in 1.0in 1.5in 2.0in 2.5in 3.0in 3.5in 4.0in 4.5in 5.0in 5.5in 6.0in"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; "> </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span class="applestyle"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;">Adoption is the embracing of another parent's child as your own with all due rights and privileges as if they were born to you. Yet this child has a life that proceeded you whether it was the nine months in utero or years in the care of birth-family. There are invisible ties to those voices, those faces, those inner impressions that can never be removed. And when taken from their birth-mother the ties may be stretched but they never break. The issue is how will the child and their subsequent adoptive family handle these wounds, memories, and feelings.</span></span></span><span style="font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"; mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman""><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family:"Arial","sans-serif";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman""><o:p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"> </span></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span class="applestyle"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;">Children respond to all stimuli externally or internally from a sinful selfish perspective. They may even make vows in their hearts to do or not to do a thing though they know no words or formal language yet. Impressions and selfishness will drive their motives and state of being even when they are in utero. </span></span></span><span style="font-family:"Arial","sans-serif";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman""><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman""><o:p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"> </span></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span class="applestyle"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;">Younger children or infants may seem perfectly content with their life in the adoptive family until around age 10-12. Then as the hormones begin to intensify and the child becomes more aware of who they are in the world questions arise such as, "Where did I came from?" and, "Why did my birth-mom give me up?" This especially intensifies if they are rebelling in their hearts against the Lord's command to 'honor thy father and mother'.</span></span></span><span style="font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman""><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family:"Arial","sans-serif";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman""><o:p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"> </span></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span class="applestyle"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;">Older children, however, come with deep wounds, questions, and/or strong emotions towards birth-mother already in place. They have more than likely been cared for by birth-mom to an age of understanding but due to neglect, disease, or death are placed in an orphanage or foster care home by well meaning officials. Due to this, the child will often times personify contempt towards self and others. "If only I were different I would not have been 'taken' away from my mom." Or "You people are terrible and I will never like you because I will love only my 'real' mom." </span></span></span><span style="font-family:"Arial","sans-serif";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman""><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family:"Arial","sans-serif";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman""><o:p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"> </span></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span class="applestyle"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;">Anger, confusion, betrayal flood the child's heart. Vows will be made. Walls will be build. Doors will be bolted shut. Their heart will become an impregnable fortress and their actions will declare their feelings loud and clear. You cannot get in here!! This invisible tie to the birth-family binds the child's capacity to receive and give love. It binds their ability to trust and be trustworthy. The motivating factor for all of these reactions is just good old-fashion sin. It develops from the child's desire to preserve self and exalt their desires over what is best for them. The matter is never truly resolved in the children's heart until they get to the point where they want to face truth. </span></span></span><span style="font-family:"Arial","sans-serif";mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman""><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family:"Arial","sans-serif";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman""><o:p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"> </span></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span class="applestyle"><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;">Truth alone is what loosens the ties that bind and creates ribbons of strength that will stay unfurl in the calm or storms of life with the adoptive family. And that truth which will set them free is only found in Jesus. He is "the Way and the Truth and the Life." It is all about Christ. He is the key to unlocking the doors, taking down the bricks one by one, and confessed vows breaking their hold. His truth will rush in like a flood releasing the captives to love and be loved, to trust and be trusted. For "If the Son therefore shall make you free, ye shall be free indeed." John 8:36</span></span></span><span style="font-family:"Arial","sans-serif";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman""><o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="tab-stops:0in .5in 1.0in 1.5in 2.0in 2.5in 3.0in 3.5in 4.0in 4.5in 5.0in 5.5in 6.0in"><span style="font-family:"Arial","sans-serif";mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman""><o:p> </o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="tab-stops:0in .5in 1.0in 1.5in 2.0in 2.5in 3.0in 3.5in 4.0in 4.5in 5.0in 5.5in 6.0in"><span class="applestyle"><span style="font-size:10.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"; mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"">Copyright 2006 Robert Sanford, revised 2010</span></span><span style="font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman""><o:p></o:p></span></p>Robert and Katherinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03658174516021661130noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2947078923442767815.post-27591468736695483852010-09-27T13:39:00.000-07:002010-09-27T14:38:02.828-07:00Adoption Matters<p style="margin-top:5.0pt;margin-right:0in;margin-bottom:5.0pt;margin-left: 0in"><span class="Apple-style-span" ></span></p><span class="Apple-style-span" ><p style="margin-top:5.0pt;margin-right:0in;margin-bottom:5.0pt;margin-left: 0in"><i>A father of the fatherless...is God in his holy habitation. God setteth the solitary in families. </i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">Psalm 68:5-6a</span></p><p style="margin-top:5.0pt;margin-right:0in;margin-bottom:5.0pt;margin-left: 0in"><br /></p><p style="margin-top:5.0pt;margin-right:0in;margin-bottom:5.0pt;margin-left: 0in">There has been and will always be orphans, children devoid of parents either by abandonment, death, or disease. That is why the Bible speaks over 60 times about visiting the fatherless in their oppression and reaching out to the fatherless. </p><p style="margin-top:5.0pt;margin-right:0in;margin-bottom:5.0pt;margin-left: 0in"><br /></p><p style="margin-top:5.0pt;margin-right:0in;margin-bottom:5.0pt;margin-left: 0in">That is why Adoption Matters.</p><p style="margin-top:5.0pt;margin-right:0in;margin-bottom:5.0pt;margin-left: 0in"><br /></p><p style="margin-top:5.0pt;margin-right:0in;margin-bottom:5.0pt;margin-left: 0in">God declares He is the "father of the fatherless" and true religion unadulterated is to "visit the fatherless...in their affliction" yet for centuries the average Christian in the world has overlooked the plight of the orphan. The Church had not risen up to do what God has set forth as a standard and avenue to receive great blessing through caring for orphans. However, it is just "such as time as this" that hearts toward orphans are beginning to change. </p><p style="margin-top:5.0pt;margin-right:0in;margin-bottom:5.0pt;margin-left: 0in"><br /></p><p style="margin-top:5.0pt;margin-right:0in;margin-bottom:5.0pt;margin-left: 0in">In the first century church Christians looked after the orphans of their cities. It was an outgrowth of their understanding of the scriptures as well as following the example set by their Jewish predecessors. The custom of their faith was to take orphans and give them to childless couples. Children were also placed with widows for the mutual benefit of each looking after the other. R.J. Rushdoony wrote in his book "The Atheism of the Early Church":</p><p style="margin-top:5.0pt;margin-right:0in;margin-bottom:5.0pt;margin-left: 0in"><br /></p><p style="margin-top:5.0pt;margin-right:0in;margin-bottom:5.0pt;margin-left: 0in"><i>.... when the unwanted babies were born, they were promptly taken and abandoned under the bridges of the river Tiber in Rome. In other cities there were places which were routinely used for abandoning babies. </i></p><p style="margin-top:5.0pt;margin-right:0in;margin-bottom:5.0pt;margin-left: 0in"><i>The Christians made it their habit immediately to go to the places where these babies were abandoned — to be devoured, as Tertullian said, by wild dogs — to collect these infants and parcel them out from family to family. This tells us something about the life of faith among these believers. How many members of congregations today would welcome an officer of the church coming by with an abandoned baby or two, and feel it was their duty to rear them in faith!1 </i></p><p style="margin-top:5.0pt;margin-right:0in;margin-bottom:5.0pt;margin-left: 0in"><br /></p><p style="margin-top:5.0pt;margin-right:0in;margin-bottom:5.0pt;margin-left: 0in">This tradition can be seen today in part with Crisis Pregnancy Centers, foster care systems, orphanages/children’s homes, and adoption agencies. But instead of "an officer of the church" placing the orphans in homes it is the Lord moving the hearts of his people to pursue adoption.</p><p style="margin-top:5.0pt;margin-right:0in;margin-bottom:5.0pt;margin-left: 0in"><br /></p><p style="margin-top:5.0pt;margin-right:0in;margin-bottom:5.0pt;margin-left: 0in">In fact, adoption is becoming a rampant norm in America. You may be seeing it played out in micro-version within your home and/or community but it is actually becoming a national phenomena. More precise Christians are being called by the Lord to adopt or to participate in facilitating adoptions like never before seen in this country. Part of that explosion can possibly be explained in the fact that adoption does not carry with it the stigma that it did 50 years ago or even 20 years ago. At that time adoption was considered what to do when you could not have a birth-child, not what to do in spite of birth-children. (This is still the case in countries such as Russia and the Philippines where adoption is seen as a stigma. Therefore even Christians do not step out in faith to take in their own orphans and countrymen.) Also the mind change that is apparently occurring in Christians asserts "It is not about having children. But it is about reaching out to children who need a family, who need to know Christ, who need discipleship to follow Christ." </p><p style="margin-top:5.0pt;margin-right:0in;margin-bottom:5.0pt;margin-left: 0in"><br /></p><p style="margin-top:5.0pt;margin-right:0in;margin-bottom:5.0pt;margin-left: 0in">The Lord is doing this marvelous work! It is reminiscent of the early church. And that too is why Adoption Matters are on the rise. Bringing strangers into your established home and expectations, especially if they are older children, is often akin to combining fire and gasoline in your kitchen. Not a practice conducive to peace and joy! Yet if God has placed this call on a family, then they are to trust him as well as be obedient to this work. Adoption issues are as diverse and involved as the children and families they affect. Yet there are common threads of grace. Our desire is to be a ‘voice crying in the wilderness’ to lead the way for adoptive homes to be full of peace and joy and not regret and misery. Our hope and prayer is that Christian families who risk all to bring an orphan into their home may bear witness to the Lord’s glory through the calling on their lives to adopt.</p><p style="margin-top:5.0pt;margin-right:0in;margin-bottom:5.0pt;margin-left: 0in"><br /></p><p style="margin-top:5.0pt;margin-right:0in;margin-bottom:5.0pt;margin-left: 0in">Adoption Matters because God’s heart is for the fatherless and He calls Christians to the work of caring for them.</p><p style="margin-top:5.0pt;margin-right:0in;margin-bottom:5.0pt;margin-left: 0in"><br /></p><p style="margin-top:5.0pt;margin-right:0in;margin-bottom:5.0pt;margin-left: 0in">Adoption Matters are as varied and distinct as the families who open their hearts and homes to orphans. </p><p style="margin-top:5.0pt;margin-right:0in;margin-bottom:5.0pt;margin-left: 0in"><br /></p><p style="margin-top:5.0pt;margin-right:0in;margin-bottom:5.0pt;margin-left: 0in">That is why Adoption Matters. </p><p style="margin-top:5.0pt;margin-right:0in;margin-bottom:5.0pt;margin-left: 0in"><br /></p><p style="margin-top:5.0pt;margin-right:0in;margin-bottom:5.0pt;margin-left: 0in"><br /></p><p style="margin-top:5.0pt;margin-right:0in;margin-bottom:5.0pt;margin-left: 0in"><br /></p><p style="margin-top:5.0pt;margin-right:0in;margin-bottom:5.0pt;margin-left: 0in"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><i>1. R.J. Rushdoony, </i>The Atheism of the Early Church<i> (Vallecito, CA: Ross House Books, 1983, 2000), 10.</i></span></p><p style="margin-top:5.0pt;margin-right:0in;margin-bottom:5.0pt;margin-left: 0in"><br /></p><p style="margin-top:5.0pt;margin-right:0in;margin-bottom:5.0pt;margin-left: 0in"></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="tab-stops:0in .5in 1.0in 1.5in 2.0in 2.5in 3.0in 3.5in 4.0in 4.5in 5.0in 5.5in 6.0in"><span class="applestyle"><span style="font-size:10.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"; mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"">Copyright 2006 Robert Sanford, revised 2010</span></span><span style="font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman""><o:p></o:p></span></p><p></p></span><p></p>Robert and Katherinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03658174516021661130noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2947078923442767815.post-66312829624596947152010-09-08T19:27:00.000-07:002010-09-11T06:50:21.174-07:00Fourteen From Him<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjzbDEnaRSNWfHn7RJ4RzjvEfjXMXCQYOgZUW0H17SL9QJV3wUyvssjBLPXFrwzQb0M3yZ6gtkqjWBU_1MbaI9p6Bdw1T98PPgDzpjXHGqxcsqHzx_vdbIj9YoxVig5-88VBm2IcvmF_rVL/s1600/Sanford+Family+2006.JPG"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjzbDEnaRSNWfHn7RJ4RzjvEfjXMXCQYOgZUW0H17SL9QJV3wUyvssjBLPXFrwzQb0M3yZ6gtkqjWBU_1MbaI9p6Bdw1T98PPgDzpjXHGqxcsqHzx_vdbIj9YoxVig5-88VBm2IcvmF_rVL/s320/Sanford+Family+2006.JPG" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5515002582286206162" /></a><div style="text-align: center;">Sanford Family 2006</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:Calibri;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:large;"><div><span style="font-family:Calibri;">The Lord was pleased to give us 14 children. The irony is my husband only wanted 2 children when we were married. And it would have stuck if the Lord had not given us two sons first. Therefore my husband modified his decision to 3 children because I wanted a daughter!</span></div><div><br /></div><div><span style="font-family:Calibri;"></span>Since 3 was to be the sum and total of our progeny and not wanting to 'risk' a third boy, we sought to adopt that little girl. Nervously, I called the first agency but had to leave a message. With the second agency, a kind lady answered. After briefly sharing my story of having two sons and wanting a daughter she told me in no uncertain terms, "You have two healthy young boys, all you can hope to adopt is a black child, older child, special needs child, or a sibling group. The wait for a healthy white baby girl would be years."</div><div><br /></div><div>I was totally frightened out of my wits by this news of the only adoptable children!! We are southerners, dark skinned people did not live with whites, I did not want to change our birth order, how could I ever help a special needs child, and a sibling group meant way to many children! So we took a leap of faith for another birth-child and in August of 1990 the Lord gave us a beautiful red-headed baby girl. Eight weeks later my tubes were tied. Oh, but God was moving!</div><div><br /></div><div>September of the next year, Melinda and I had dropped off Joshua and Garrison for their first day of preschool. On our way home, we stopped by the mailbox to get the mail. It was the normal stuff of mail including the monthly magazine published by our electric company. On the cover of this issue was a mom with her two children sitting in a swing on their front porch reading a book. The bold letters printed across their legs stated 'Home Schooling' page 12.</div><div><br /></div><div>We had already heard of home schooling. Our neighbors across the street had four children, two of which were school age, and they were home all day! I had watched her for three years and thought she was crazy. Why would she not want to enjoy time to herself and self-pursuits with her children safely tucked away in public school? And anyway she just seemed weird.</div><div><br /></div><div>So there I am in my quiet little living room, my heart torn because I had just left my two very precious boys at a place of 'higher learning'. Joshua, as a social 4 year old, was all for it but Garrison, a shy 2 1/2 year old, was clingy. I had to make him stay. It is what you are supposed to do, right? I hated it but I wanted to be a good mom and prepare my boys for school. Obviously I could not prepare them. My college degree was not in teaching. Oh, but God was moving!</div><div><br /></div><div>After reading the magazine article, I was intrigued. My husband was guarded but fine with me finding out more. So I gather the children up the next day and we went to the library to find some books about this allusive subject. The three-foot self which held all the home school books was empty except for two. I took them home after requesting from the library several of the other books to be held for me once they were returned. These books changed our life. I was convicted of huge sins and saw God for the first time from, what we would call today, a 'Christian worldview'. We had never been taught that God wants all of us and every day, not just our Sunday. And that the Bible is not hard to understand but is the guidebook for all of life. Oh, the grief, oh, the joy, but God was moving!</div><div><br /></div><div>We pulled our boys out of preschool after only two days. Then I introduced myself to my neighbor. She became my friend and mentor. Beth McDowell is the wife of Stephen McDowell who is a historian, author, and world conference speaker. He is co-laborer with Paul Jehle, John Eidsmoe, Gary Demar, David Barton, and William Potter as well as others. We did not understand any of this at the time. All we knew was they were our kind neighbors who counseled us, and our children were friends.</div><div><br /></div><div>This was also when God moved in our hearts to understand that <em>children are a blessing and the fruit of the womb is his reward</em>. We wanted more blessing and reward, so we sought to undo what we had done years before. The doctor was firm and specific, he could untie my tubes. However there would be a 50/50 chance of each pregnancy being a tubal due to scar tissue and my life would always be in danger. For my husband the decision was easy, no surgery. He wanted his wife. For me the news was more devastating, I wanted more children. Oh, but God was moving!</div><div><br /></div><div>And so were we. In 1997, State Farm moved my husband from Virginia to the corporate office in Bloomington, IL. We settled into a newly built home and new community. We found a evangelical church were folks actually brought their Bibles and opened them! The desire for more children was my constant prayer since 1991 and in 1998 it became a burning fire in my heart. One day in the spring of that year, I opened the local paper to find a full page ad for some 2,000 children in the Illinois foster care system who were available for adoption. Up to this point we had only considered international adoptions which cost loads of money we did not have. The Lord used our 'poverty' to turn our hearts closer to home to find our children.</div><div><br /></div><div>To make an already long story short, we pursued a DCFS adoption. On September 30, 1999 the Lord was pleased to give us a baby girl of black and white race. On October 20, 1999 the Lord gave us a sibling group of three girls changing our birth-order. In November of 2003 God took us international for an adoption. We traveled to Russia to bring home a sibling group of four, two of which were special needs children. And lastly in May of 2005 we brought home another sibling group of three with very dark skin from the Philippines. (Both international adoptions were completely financed by the Lord through family and friends meeting a matching grant through <em>Lifesong for Orphans</em> and adoption grants with State Farm.)</div><div><span style="font-family:Calibri;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="font-family:Calibri;">So what was spoken</span><span style="font-family:Calibri;"><em> </em>by the lady from the adoption agency back in the spring of 1989 was actually a prophecy,<span style="font-family:Calibri;"><em> 'all you can hope to adopt is a black child, older child, special needs child, or a sibling group', </em>f</span>or by this God moved to fulfill our hope and joy of more children.</span></div><div><br /></div><div><span style="font-family:Calibri;"></span>Fourteen from Him: seven boys and seven girls. <em>Our blessing and reward.</em></div><div><em><br /></em></div><div><em><br /></em></div><div><em>~Katherine</em></div> <div><span style="font-family:Calibri;"></span> </div> <div><span style="font-family:Calibri;"></span> </div> <div><span style="font-family:Calibri;"></span> </div> <div><span style="font-family:Calibri;"></span> </div> <div><span style="font-family:Calibri;"></span> </div> <div><span style="font-family:Calibri;"></span> </div> <div><span style="font-family:Calibri;"></span> </div> <div><span style="font-family:Calibri;"></span> </div> <div><span style="font-family:Calibri;"></span> </div></span></span></div></div>Robert and Katherinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03658174516021661130noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2947078923442767815.post-80323433474266599112010-06-25T19:48:00.000-07:002010-06-25T19:50:06.510-07:00WelcomeWelcome to Bob and Katherine Sanford's blog. Obviously God has brought you here for a reason but for the time being this blog is under construction. Please check back regularly as we plan to have this up and running in the near future, Lord willing.<br /><br />God bless you all!Robert and Katherinehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03658174516021661130noreply@blogger.com4